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At the Funeral 2/24/2019
A cardiologist died and was given an eleborate funeral.
<br><br>
A huge heart, covered in flowers, stood behind the casket
during the service. <br><br>
Following the eulogy, the heart opened, and the casket
rolled inside. The beautiful heart then closed, sealing
the doctor inside, forever. <br><br>
At that point, one of the mourners burst into laughter.
When ...
6 Comments, 116 Views,
27 Votes
,4.40 Score
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Cotton Candy 2/24/2019
So this old man is walking down the street in Brooklyn. <br><br>
He sees a young boy sitting on the street in front of a candy
shop, shoving sweets in his mouth as fast as possible. <br><br>
<br><br> <br><br> The man walks up to the boy and says "You know , it's
really not healthy to eat all that candy." <br><br>
The looks ...
1 Comments, 83 Views,
17 Votes
,4.12 Score
|
|
oldest 2/24/2019
"They say checkers is the oldest." "Oh, no, poker is older. Didnt Noah draw pairs on the
Ark and get a full house when world had a flush?"
0 Comments, 16 Views,
10 Votes
,3.39 Score
|
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Otherwise OK 2/24/2019
"Darling you would a be wonderful dancer but for two
things." "what are they, my love?" "Your feet!"
3 Comments, 27 Views,
13 Votes
,2.81 Score
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A Guy Walks into a Bar... 2/23/2019
And orders 10 shots of gin, neat. He slams them back, 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10
POW!!! all in a row, NO CHASER. The bartender is astonished.
<br><br>
"Holy shit pal, what are YOU celebrating?"
the bartender says. <br><br>
Guy says, "My first blow job" <br><br>
The bartender says "Why didnt you say so? Next drinks on the house, pal" ...
4 Comments, 53 Views,
13 Votes
,3.48 Score
|
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this is a terrible tweeker joke 2/20/2019
How do you know when your girl has done to much dope? <br><br>
<br><br>
Her wet spot cracks back!
0 Comments, 17 Views,
12 Votes
,1.39 Score
|
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Cheat Day 2/17/2019
Bob and his wife started dieting a week ago. His wife proposed
that they should have a cheat day today. <br><br>
She brought home McDonald’s burgers, KFC wings. Bob
brought home his secretary. <br><br>
From his hospital bed, Bob is wondering when men will ever
begin to understand women.
3 Comments, 45 Views,
13 Votes
,3.31 Score
|
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Points 2/14/2019
Just here for the points
6 Comments, 31 Views,
13 Votes
,2.47 Score
|
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Points 2/14/2019
Just here for the points
4 Comments, 21 Views,
6 Votes
,2.51 Score
|
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Lorrainia Bobbit 2/13/2019
Have you heard that Lorrainia Bobbit moved to Russia and
changed her last name? Answer!! Too Lorriania Cuts your cockoff!!!
2 Comments, 15 Views,
8 Votes
,2.32 Score
|
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the best joke 2/13/2019
whats the best joke you remember?
1 Comments, 27 Views,
11 Votes
,1.48 Score
|
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Man ask the Doctor 2/11/2019
Do you think I shall live until I'm ninety, doctor?"
"How old are you now?" "Forty." "Do you drink, gamble, smoke, or have you any vices
of any kind?" <br><br>
"No. I don't drink, I never gamble, I loathe smoking;
in fact, I don't have any vices." <br><br>
"Well, good heavens, what do you want to live another ...
2 Comments, 63 Views,
18 Votes
,4.35 Score
|
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Woman buys a Gun 2/11/2019
A woman goes into a sporting goods store to buy a rifle. "Its for my husband, " she tells the clerk.
"Did he tell you what gauge to get?" asked the
clerk. "Are you kidding?" she says. "He doesnt
even know that Im going to shoot him!"
0 Comments, 37 Views,
12 Votes
,3.51 Score
|
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Indoors.. 2/9/2019
It does not matter what the temperature is, it's always
room temperature!
1 Comments, 25 Views,
13 Votes
,1.47 Score
|
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Question... 2/6/2019
If Con is the opposite of Pro, is Congress the opposite of
Progress? <br><br>
Get the point?
1 Comments, 30 Views,
6 Votes
,1.94 Score
|
|
Aricle #1 2/5/2019
Coming soon...will add later on
1 Comments, 14 Views,
11 Votes
,2.23 Score
|
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Fuc'em 2/5/2019
Fuc'em if they can't take a joke!!
3 Comments, 16 Views,
8 Votes
,2.32 Score
|
|
points 2/5/2019
One day 2 blondes were talking. Blonde 1 says "guess
what! I just had sex with a Brazilian guy!" Blonde 2 replies "OMG you ! how many is a Brazilian?"
3 Comments, 20 Views,
6 Votes
,3.08 Score
|
|
Where do babies come from? 2/5/2019
A mother is in the kitchen one day, preparing dinner for
the family. <br><br> Her young walks in and asks her, “Mommy, where
do babies come from?” <br><br> The mother thinks for a while before deciding she ought
to be honest with her . She says, “Well honey,
Mommy and fall in love and get married. One night they go into their bedroom, they kiss and hug, and then ...
0 Comments, 40 Views,
6 Votes
,2.80 Score
|
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Marriage Game 2/5/2019
My girlfriend said to me last night, “You treat our relationship
like some kind of game!” <br><br>
Which unfortunately cost her 12 points and a bonus chance!!!!!!!
1 Comments, 18 Views,
7 Votes
,3.55 Score
|
|
Penis Book 2/5/2019
A man walks into a library and asks the librarian, "Do
you have that book for men with small penises?" <br><br>
The librarian checks her computer and says, "I don't
know if it's in yet." <br><br>
The man replies, "Yes, that's the one."
2 Comments, 27 Views,
6 Votes
,4.79 Score
|
|
Silly but funny... 2/4/2019
   
<br><br> Q: What can a put behind her ears to make her sexy? A: Her knees.
<br><br> Q: What's a man's definition of a romantic evening?
A: Sex. <br><br> Q: What do you it when you have oral sex, vaginal sex, and anal sex with your all in the same night? A: The fucking
cycle. ...
2 Comments, 19 Views,
2 Votes
,3.12 Score
|
|
Some more jokes for the bar 2/4/2019
Q: What did the hurricane say to the coconut palm tree? A: Hold on to your nuts, this is no ordinary blow job! <br><br>
Q: Whats a condom and a coffin got in common? A: They both hold stiffs but one is cumin and one is going!
<br><br>
Q: When is a man most intelligent, before, after or during
sex? A: During sex cuz he's plugged up to the knowledge source. ...
1 Comments, 19 Views,
2 Votes
,4.50 Score
|
|
MR MAN 2/4/2019
Mr Tickle found his soul mate Tess. <br><br>
He asked her to marry him.. She agreed on condition that she did not have to take his
surname!
1 Comments, 22 Views,
3 Votes
,3.92 Score
|
|
Few more good ones... 1/30/2019
What’s the difference between a and a drug dealer?
A can wash her crack and resell it. <br><br>
What do the Mafia and pussies have in common? One slip of
the tongue, and you’re in deep shit. <br><br>
What did the banana say to the vibrator? Why are you shaking?
She’s gonna eat me! <br><br> Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle? Because his wife died. ...
0 Comments, 42 Views,
14 Votes
,2.66 Score
|
|
A few good ones... 1/30/2019
What’s the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball?
A guy will actually search for a golf ball. <br><br>
What does the sign on an out-of-business brothel say? Beat it. We’re closed. <br><br>
Why was the guitar teacher arrested? For fingering a minor. <br><br>
What’s the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms?
One’s a Goodyear. The other’s ...
0 Comments, 22 Views,
8 Votes
,0.93 Score
|
|
Red Riding Hood 1/30/2019
Red Riding Hood was walking through the forest heading
to visit her grandmother. While on the path, a deer walked
up to her and said the wolf was going to eat her. "OK",
she told the deer and continued on her way. After a little
while, a little rabbit approached little red and said the
wolf was gong to eat her. "OK", she told the rabbit
and continued on her way. After a little ...
0 Comments, 50 Views,
6 Votes
,1.94 Score
|
|
The moral of the story is... 1/28/2019
There was a young couple engaged to be married, one day the
man found himself alone in the kitchen with his future mother
in law. She was exceptionally attractive like his future
wife. His future father in law had just left for the store,
and took his with him. They were both alone and
he could sense this strange sexual chemistry building.
<br><br> "I'd like to ask you ...
3 Comments, 63 Views,
11 Votes
,4.10 Score
|
|
jackass and onion 1/28/2019
what do you get when you cross a jackass with a onion a.a piece
of ass that brings a tear too your eye
0 Comments, 4 Views,
2 Votes
,2.42 Score
|
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Photoshop by Fran 1/27/2019
Come on Fran in SEXFinder.com Naughty Community you need to so go back
to Art School . Your Photoshopping is is so bad in 99% of all
your postings on that group. You really like to doctor up
the pictures with the white for FAKE CUM .LOL . I mean really
, just because I called you on it in the group you band me.
WHAT A JOKE! HA HA HA
1 Comments, 37 Views,
12 Votes
,2.09 Score
|
|
Would you rather: 1/27/2019
1. Give up on oral sex, or 2. Give up on eating cheese..??? <br><br>
You must pick one and only one.. Thanks
2 Comments, 29 Views,
7 Votes
,1.51 Score
|
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Fighting 1/23/2019
Nine-year- Aaron came home from the playground with a bloody
nose... ..., black eye, and torn clothing. It was obvious he'd been in a bad fight and lost. While his
father was patching him up, he asked his what happened. <br><br>
"Well, Dad, " said Aaron, "I challenged
Larry to a duel. And, you know, I gave him his choice of weapons."
<br><br> ...
1 Comments, 19 Views,
2 Votes
,5.20 Score
|
|
How it really is 1/23/2019
My Dad and I were talking the other night about love and marriage.
He told me that he knew as early as their wedding what marriage
to my Mom would be like. It seems the minister asked my Mom,
"Do you take this man to be your husband." <br><br>
And she said, "I do." <br><br>
Then the minister asked my Dad, "Do you take this woman
to be your wife, ...
3 Comments, 83 Views,
15 Votes
,3.28 Score
|
|
Oh what a day! 1/22/2019
Guy wakes up the morning and tries to get ready for work and
discovers that there is no hot water. The superintendent
tells him the problem will be fixed later that day but there
will be no hot water to shower with. He says to himself "today
is not my day". He leaves for work and as he is driving,
he blows a flat tire. He says to himself "today is just
not my day". He ...
1 Comments, 128 Views,
9 Votes
,3.43 Score
|
|
Superman, beware! 1/22/2019
Superman was flying high in the sky when spots Wonder Woman
down below on a beach, wearing sleeping goggles, lying
on her back completely nude with legs spread apart. 'She
must be sun bathing' he thought to himself. Anyways
the temptation was too much so flies down and does his thing
and takes off in nothing flat. Wonder Woman then says to
the Invisible Man " Is something wrong ...
1 Comments, 113 Views,
9 Votes
,1.72 Score
|
|
Relatives 1/21/2019
What’s worse than ants in your pants? <br><br>
Uncles.
1 Comments, 17 Views,
9 Votes
,3.43 Score
|
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Geeves - a popular name for a butler. 1/20/2019
A man is at work in his office and decides to give his wife
a call just to say hello. He calls home (let's assume
this was pre-cell phone times) and his beloved, loyal and
reliable butler, Geeves, answers the phone. He asks to
speak to the Mrs. and the butler replies "I'm
sorry sir, your wife is not able to speak to you at this moment".
The man says "What? What do you ...
0 Comments, 135 Views,
10 Votes
,1.59 Score
|
|
Doctor visit 1/20/2019
A guy is sitting at the doctor’s office. <br><br>
“The doctor walks in: ‘Sir, I have some bad news. I’m
afraid you’re going to have to stop masturbating.’
<br><br>
Patient: ‘I don’t understand, doc. Why?’ <br><br>
Doctor: ‘Because I’m trying to examine you.'”
1 Comments, 27 Views,
15 Votes
,2.98 Score
|
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Just want Sex 1/20/2019
000000 -0000- =-00-= DD [================================DDDD DDDD [================================DDDD =-00-= DD -00000- 0000000
2 Comments, 15 Views,
8 Votes
,1.16 Score
|
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points 1/18/2019
need points!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
3 Comments, 15 Views,
9 Votes
,3.43 Score
|
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What’s the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms? 1/16/2019
One’s a Goodyear. The other’s a GREAT year.
1 Comments, 19 Views,
10 Votes
,2.99 Score
|
|
Why do women wear makeup & perfume? 1/16/2019
Because they smell bad & they're ugly.
1 Comments, 16 Views,
5 Votes
,0.21 Score
|
|
Where are you from 1/16/2019
A group of heavy set women are sitting at the corner of a bar,
the bar tender goes over to take their order and immediately
notices their accent. In an effort to make small talk he
asks “oh where are you ladies from? Scotland?” The
ladies look at him with a mean glare, scoff and respond “Wales”
With that the bartender apologizes “ I sorry where
are you Whales from? Scotland?”
2 Comments, 31 Views,
9 Votes
,3.64 Score
|
|
Cave times 1/15/2019
Why do men tend to fall asleep after sex?? <br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
All planned!! So they don't leave...
0 Comments, 18 Views,
4 Votes
,1.30 Score
|
|
Secret Service get excited 1/13/2019
President Trump was leaving the White
House for a rally. As he was walking from the West Wing to
the limo, a derange assassin jump out and took aim. A rooking
Secret Service agent drew his gun and yelled "Mickey
Mouse". The assassin, startled, hesitated and was
shot by other agents. The lead agent grabbed the rookie
and asked him what happened. The rooking shrugged ...
1 Comments, 62 Views,
6 Votes
,2.80 Score
|
|
Duck and pig 1/12/2019
A man walks into his house carrying a duck 🦆 in his arms
and says “So this is the pig I have been fucking.” His
wife with a look of confusion responds “That’s a duck
you dumb shit” and the man simply responds “I wasn’t
talking to you”
2 Comments, 29 Views,
10 Votes
,3.58 Score
|
|
Weekend 1/12/2019
Ok let’s start the weekend off right. Who has a good one?
0 Comments, 1 Views,
1 Votes
,1.10 Score
|
|
quick 1/6/2019
knock knock
2 Comments, 39 Views,
10 Votes
,0.80 Score
|
|
Whats Common 1/5/2019
What do a penis and a Rubik's Cube have in common? <br><br>
The more you play with it, the harder it gets.
0 Comments, 11 Views,
7 Votes
,2.79 Score
|
|
thursday jokes 1/3/2019
ok almost another week end who can start if off right with
a good joke??
0 Comments, 0 Views,
0 Votes
|
|
Cinderella 1/2/2019
What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball? <br><br>
She gagged.
2 Comments, 7 Views,
3 Votes
,1.96 Score
|
|
SexEd 1/2/2019
In the Sex Ed class the teacher says, "All right, class,
I want you to go home and come back tomorrow with as many positions
as you can think of for having sex." The next day she says to Little Johnny in the back, "Well,
John, how many positions did you come up with?" Johnny says, "Seventy-three." The teacher says, "Oh, my goodness...uh...very
good, John, very ...
1 Comments, 106 Views,
14 Votes
,2.98 Score
|
|
I never remember the punch line 1/2/2019
Maybe it is because I am lazy or that the jokes I hear are not
that funny, but I never remember longer jokes or I forget
the punch lines. Anytime someone asks for a joke this is
the only one I can remember. <br><br>
-How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? -"How Many?" -Two, but don't you wonder how they got in there?
2 Comments, 21 Views,
11 Votes
,2.23 Score
|
|
lights off when having sex 12/31/2018
A man and woman had been married for 30 years, and in those
30 years, they always left the lights off when having sex.
He was embarrassed and scared that he couldn't please
her, so he always used a big dildo on her. All these years
she had no clue. One day, she decided to reach over and flip
the light switch on and saw that he was using a dildo. She
said "I knew it, asshole, explain the ...
3 Comments, 75 Views,
14 Votes
,4.74 Score
|
|
Why did I get divorced? 12/31/2018
Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn't wish
me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my .
I went to work and even my colleagues didn't wish me
a happy birthday. As I entered my office, my secretary said,
"Happy birthday, boss!" I felt so special.
She asked me out for lunch. After lunch, she invited me to
her apartment. We went there and she said, "Do you ...
1 Comments, 58 Views,
12 Votes
,4.74 Score
|
|
lesbians 12/31/2018
what do you call two lesbians in a closet? <br><br>
<br><br>
a licker cabinet!!!! lol
1 Comments, 17 Views,
10 Votes
,2.39 Score
|
|
lesbians 12/31/2018
what do you call two lesbians in a closet? <br><br>
<br><br>
a licker cabinet!!!! lol
0 Comments, 8 Views,
8 Votes
,3.48 Score
|
|
Blind man 12/30/2018
A blind man walked into a bar <br><br>
<br><br>
and then a table <br><br>
and then a chair.....
0 Comments, 27 Views,
7 Votes
,2.02 Score
|
|
Jokes 12/28/2018
Did you hear about the kidnapping at the school? <br><br>
It's ok, he woke up.
1 Comments, 15 Views,
4 Votes
,2.08 Score
|
|
scotch 12/28/2018
"So Amy married a Scotchman. How does he treat her?"
"reluctantly."
2 Comments, 26 Views,
11 Votes
,2.05 Score
|
|
Eavesdropping 12/27/2018
In my early 20s, I began dating this girl. We went to her house,
one thing lead to another, and we began to have our first
sex times together. It was a hot summer day in a shitty apartment
with no AC. All the doors and windows were open. We were going
at it, and that's when I quite happily found out she
was a screamer. It was intense and passionate; we lost ourselves
in each other... About ...
1 Comments, 80 Views,
12 Votes
,3.51 Score
|
|
More dirty jokes 12/27/2018
What’s the difference between a woman with PMS and a terrorist?
<br><br>
You can negotiate with a terrorist. <br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree? <br><br>
Hold on to your nuts, this ain’t no ordinary blowjob.
<br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
A couple walking in the ...
1 Comments, 35 Views,
7 Votes
,5.08 Score
|
|
More dirty jokes 12/27/2018
What’s the difference between a woman with PMS and a terrorist?
<br><br>
You can negotiate with a terrorist. <br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree? <br><br>
Hold on to your nuts, this ain’t no ordinary blowjob.
<br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
A couple walking in the ...
0 Comments, 13 Views,
5 Votes
,3.80 Score
|
|
Dirty Jokes 12/27/2018
What’s the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball?
<br><br>
A guy will actually search for a golf ball. <br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
What’s the difference between your wife and your job?
<br><br>
After five years, your job will still suck. <br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
Know what a 6.9 is? ...
0 Comments, 20 Views,
7 Votes
,4.57 Score
|
|
Dirty Jokes 12/27/2018
What’s the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball?
<br><br>
A guy will actually search for a golf ball. <br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
What’s the difference between your wife and your job?
<br><br>
After five years, your job will still suck. <br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
Know what a 6.9 is? ...
0 Comments, 10 Views,
6 Votes
,5.64 Score
|
|
Dirty Jokes 12/27/2018
What’s the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball?
<br><br>
A guy will actually search for a golf ball. <br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
What’s the difference between your wife and your job?
<br><br>
After five years, your job will still suck. <br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
Know what a 6.9 is? ...
0 Comments, 3 Views,
3 Votes
,5.39 Score
|
|
Who's the Boob? 12/25/2018
A man named Mike went over to his friend's house and
rang the bell. His friend's wife, Nora, answered the
door. <br><br>
"Hi, is Tony home?" he asked her. <br><br>
"No, he went to the store." <br><br>
"Well, you mind if I wait?" <br><br>
"No, come on in." <br><br>
They sat down and shortly ...
3 Comments, 59 Views,
11 Votes
,3.73 Score
|
|
Who's the Boob? 12/25/2018
A man named Mike went over to his friend's house and
rang the bell. His friend's wife, Nora, answered the
door. <br><br>
"Hi, is Tony home?" he asked her. <br><br>
"No, he went to the store." <br><br>
"Well, you mind if I wait?" <br><br>
"No, come on in." <br><br>
They sat down and shortly ...
0 Comments, 22 Views,
4 Votes
,4.41 Score
|
|
Who's the Boob? 12/25/2018
A man named Mike went over to his friend's house and
rang the bell. His friend's wife, Nora, answered the
door. <br><br>
"Hi, is Tony home?" he asked her. <br><br>
"No, he went to the store." <br><br>
"Well, you mind if I wait?" <br><br>
"No, come on in." <br><br>
They sat down and shortly ...
0 Comments, 13 Views,
0 Votes
|
|
Santa Claus 12/24/2018
He loves gardening - always going Hoe hoe hoe
2 Comments, 20 Views,
10 Votes
,2.79 Score
|
|
Party Games 12/22/2018
One Monday morning a mailman is walking the neighborhood
on his usual route. As he approaches one of the homes, he
noticed that both cars were in the driveway. His wonder
was cut short by Bob, the homeowner, coming out with a load
of empty beer and liquor bottles. "Wow Bob, looks
like you guys had one hell of a party last night, "
the mailman comments. <br><br>
Bob in ...
2 Comments, 68 Views,
9 Votes
,2.57 Score
|
|
How you waft a towel 12/22/2018
6. A husband and wife are having issues in the bedroom, the
man has no issues but the woman can’t reach an orgasm,
she tells her husband it is because she gets too warm. <br><br>
After going to see a specialist, he recommended that they
have a constant supply of cool air in the bedroom, so the
man asks his best friend to waft a towel whilst him and his
wife make love. ...
1 Comments, 52 Views,
8 Votes
,2.78 Score
|
|
A 10$ handjob ? 12/22/2018
1. A man walks into a bar. Upon sitting down a busty blond
waitress pours him a drink and asks if he would like some
food. He looks up at the menu above the bar it says: <br><br>
Hot dog – $2 Cheeseburger – $5 Hand job – $10 <br><br>
He asks the waitress, “Miss are you the one who gives the
hand jobs?” She winks and replies, “why yes I am.”
He says, “Well ...
0 Comments, 55 Views,
8 Votes
,2.78 Score
|
|
New Playboy Magazine 12/22/2018
Did you here about the new Playboy book they are coming out with for married men??? <br><br>
The centerfold is the same woman every month!!! lol.
0 Comments, 8 Views,
3 Votes
,3.43 Score
|
|
Three sisters decided to get married! 12/20/2018
Three sisters decided to get married on the same day to save
their parents the expense of separate weddings. As a further
step to reduce the price tag, the three sisters resolved to spend their honeymoon night at home. Later
that night, their mother couldn’t sleep, so she went to the kitchen for a cup of tea. On her way, she tiptoed
by her oldest ’s bedroom and heard her screaming. The mother ...
2 Comments, 49 Views,
13 Votes
,3.14 Score
|
|
What some need 12/20/2018
points  it would seem
1 Comments, 12 Views,
4 Votes
,2.86 Score
|
|
Three Sisters 12/19/2018
Three sisters decided to get married on the sme day to save
their parents the expense of separate weddings. As a further
step to reduce the price tag, the three sisters resolved
to spend their honemoon night at hme. <br><br>
Later that night, their mother couldn’t sleep, so she
went to the kitchen for a cup of tea. On her way, she tiptoed
by her oldest ’s bedrm and heard her ...
0 Comments, 49 Views,
12 Votes
,3.15 Score
|
|
HORNY OLD LADIES 12/19/2018
Two elderly ladies are sitting on the front porch, doing
nothing. One old lady turns to the other and asks, "Do
you still get horny?" <br><br>
The other replies, "Oh sure I do." <br><br>
The first old lady asks, "What do you do about it?"
<br><br>
The second old lady replies, "I suck a lifesaver."
<br><br> ...
1 Comments, 67 Views,
13 Votes
,2.81 Score
|
|
food 12/19/2018
I was at Wal-mart buying a bag of food. While in the check
out line, a man behind me asked if I had a dog. (Why else would
I be buying food RIGHT??) Upon impulse I told her, No
I didn't have a dog, I was starting the "Food
Diet" again, and that I probably shouldn't because
last time I ended up in the hospital, but I had lost 50 pounds
before I awakened in intensive care with ...
0 Comments, 31 Views,
8 Votes
,3.01 Score
|
|
20 funny sex jokes 12/19/2018
1. What’s the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball?
A guy will actually search for a golf ball. <br><br>
2. What does the sign on an out-of-business brothel say?
Beat it. We’re closed. <br><br> 3. Why was the guitar teacher arrested? For fingering a
minor. <br><br> 4. What’s the difference between a tire and 365 used conms?
One’s a Goodyear. The ...
1 Comments, 33 Views,
7 Votes
,4.06 Score
|
|
Got a pair of shoes.. 12/17/2018
Got a pair of shoes from my drug dealer.. I don't know what he laced them with.. But I have been trippin ever since!
1 Comments, 17 Views,
11 Votes
,3.35 Score
|
|
For Points 12/17/2018
This is simply for some POINTS POINTS POINTS!!
0 Comments, 9 Views,
7 Votes
,2.02 Score
|
|
Female Surgery 12/17/2018
A sexually active middle-aged woman informed her plastic
surgeon that she wanted her vaginal lips reduced in size
because, over the they have become loose and floppy.
Out of embarrassment, she insisted that the surgery be
kept secret and, of course, the surgeon agreed. <br><br>
Awakening from the anesthesia, she found 3 roses carefully
placed beside her on the bed. Outraged, she ...
2 Comments, 53 Views,
4 Votes
,2.08 Score
|
|
Proof of Purchase 12/17/2018
A little lady went to buy cat food. She picked up three cans, but was told by the clerk, " sorry, but we can't sell this to you without proof you have a cat.
Too many seniors are buying cat foot to eat. Management
wants proof that you are buying this for your cat."
The lady went home, brought in her cat and was sold the cat
food. <br><br> The next day, she tried to buy ...
0 Comments, 42 Views,
3 Votes
,0.98 Score
|
|
a Sure bet 12/16/2018
Leeanne "Is your new friend rich?" <br><br>
Alys"Rich!, Why, say, that man is one of biggest machine
gun salesmen in Chicago"
2 Comments, 29 Views,
7 Votes
,4.57 Score
|
|
doing it for the points 12/14/2018
points point points points
1 Comments, 10 Views,
7 Votes
,2.79 Score
|
|
She said i am coming 12/13/2018
She said i am coming, and she kept cumming...lucky girls
0 Comments, 18 Views,
10 Votes
,2.39 Score
|
|
Apology for Blonde Jokes 12/13/2018
A young ventriloquist is touring Norway and puts on a show
in a small fishing town. With his dummy on his knee, he starts
going through his usual dumb blonde jokes. <br><br>
Suddenly, a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her
chair and starts shouting, "I've heard enough
of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can
stereotype Norwegian blonde women that ...
0 Comments, 57 Views,
7 Votes
,2.79 Score
|
|
Painting Nuns 12/13/2018
The head nun tells the two new nuns that they have to paint
their room without getting any paint on their clothes.
So the one nun says to the other, "Hey, let's take
all our clothes off, fold them up, and lock the door."
So they do this, and begin painting their room. Soon they hear a knock at the door. They ask, "Who is it?" "Blind man!" The nuns look at each ...
0 Comments, 53 Views,
6 Votes
,3.37 Score
|
|
Penalty for bigamy 12/9/2018
One of the witticisms of Lord Moosey of Ridgeburg was his
answer to a distinguished counsel who asked what the heaviest
penalty for bigamy was. "Two mother-in- laws" Moosey said promptly
.
3 Comments, 27 Views,
10 Votes
,3.19 Score
|
|
Haha be careful when asking for someones number! 12/7/2018
I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "Sex!
Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" <br><br>
I said, "Wow!" <br><br>
Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629."
5 Comments, 36 Views,
12 Votes
,4.39 Score
|
|
fancy dress 12/5/2018
I recently went to a fancy dress party dressed as a HARP and
a friend asked me what I had come dressed as. I said a HARP and he replied you cant be you're
too small to be a HARP I said are you calling me a LYRE
0 Comments, 21 Views,
12 Votes
,2.27 Score
|
|
hump day fun 12/5/2018
took some exalt after eating alphabet soup and my next trip
to the bathroom could spell trouble.
0 Comments, 6 Views,
2 Votes
,1.73 Score
|
|
monday start 12/3/2018
Here is a great joke, Notre dame got into the playoff...hahaha
so funny!!!
0 Comments, 5 Views,
3 Votes
,0.98 Score
|
|
Ponts 12/3/2018
They came and scored over n over again
2 Comments, 13 Views,
8 Votes
,1.62 Score
|
|
Sunday fundy 12/2/2018
I got nothing today, who can get things started?
0 Comments, 5 Views,
4 Votes
,0.92 Score
|
|
anti depressent pill 11/30/2018
Pharmacist to customer: “Sir, please understand, to
buy an anti-depression pill you a proper prescription.
Simply showing your marriage certificate and wife’s
picture is not enough!' lpl
0 Comments, 30 Views,
14 Votes
,3.94 Score
|
|
Marriage Counsler 11/30/2018
After 35 of marriage, a husband and wife came for counseling.
When asked what the problem was, the wife went into a tirade
listing every problem they had ever had in the they
had been married. On and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness,
loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable, an entire
laundry list of unmet needs she had endured. Finally, after allowing this for a sufficient ...
3 Comments, 130 Views,
23 Votes
,4.76 Score
|
|
erotic vs. kinky 11/29/2018
What is the difference between erotic and kinky? Erotic is using a feather. Kinky is using the whole chicken.
0 Comments, 16 Views,
11 Votes
,1.86 Score
|
|
haha 11/28/2018
What do you call a dictionary on drugs? Addictionary.
0 Comments, 5 Views,
4 Votes
,2.08 Score
|
|
haha 11/28/2018
What do you call a dictionary on drugs? Addictionary.
0 Comments, 7 Views,
5 Votes
,3.14 Score
|
|
haha 11/28/2018
What do you call a dictionary on drugs? Addictionary.
1 Comments, 10 Views,
8 Votes
,2.55 Score
|
|
haha 11/28/2018
What do you call a dictionary on drugs? Addictionary.
0 Comments, 5 Views,
4 Votes
,2.86 Score
|
|
A man goes to a ... 11/28/2018
A Man goes to a and asks for a blow job. She says
it'll be $150. <br><br> He says "what can I get for $50?" <br><br>
"A penguin." <br><br> He didn't know what a penguin was, but it was a bargain.
He agrees and she pulls his pants and underwear to his ankles
and begins to blow him. After a few minutes without a word,
she stops what ...
0 Comments, 62 Views,
10 Votes
,1.79 Score
|
|
Tuesday humor 11/27/2018
I finally quit drinking for good! <br><br>
<br><br>
now I only drink for evil!!! <br><br>
<br><br>
all I got lets have it
0 Comments, 0 Views,
0 Votes
|
|
What do you call a guy with a rubber toe? 11/27/2018
Roberto
0 Comments, 3 Views,
0 Votes
|
|
Cows 11/26/2018
What do you call a cow with no legs? <br><br>
Ground beef <br><br>
<br><br>
What is a cow's favorite leisure activity? <br><br>
Moooovies <br><br>
<br><br>
What do you call a cow in the LaBrea tar pit? <br><br>
Steak tartar
0 Comments, 13 Views,
6 Votes
,1.66 Score
|
|
3 11/25/2018
A night after tricks, three hookers who lived together
were sitting around having coffee and discussing the tricks
from the night before. The first one said " I had a fireman
the night before and the other two said "How could
you tell?" and she replies "That's easy
... his hose was over his shoulder and he smelt like like
smoke." The second one said "I had a ...
0 Comments, 54 Views,
6 Votes
,3.37 Score
|
|
3 11/25/2018
A night after tricks, three hookers who lived together
were sitting around having coffee and discussing the tricks
from the night before. The first one said " I had a fireman
the night before and the other two said "How could
you tell?" and she replies "That's easy
... his hose was over his shoulder and he smelt like like
smoke." The second one said "I had a ...
0 Comments, 17 Views,
3 Votes
,3.43 Score
|
|
stripper joke 11/25/2018
A boy goes to a strip club. His MOM gets angry Mom: Did you
see anything there that you were not supposed to see? BOY:
Yes, I saw dad! <br><br>
source: http://SEXFinder.com.com
1 Comments, 11 Views,
2 Votes
,2.42 Score
|
|
Why did the man keep throwing Monopoly Money at the stripper? 11/25/2018
Because she kept putting fake tits in his face!
1 Comments, 3 Views,
1 Votes
,1.10 Score
|
|
Why did the man keep throwing Monopoly Money at the stripper? 11/25/2018
Because she kept putting fake tits in his face!
0 Comments, 1 Views,
0 Votes
|
|
Why did I post this article? 11/24/2018
just like many of you.. to get some points
0 Comments, 2 Views,
1 Votes
|
|
Why did I post this article? 11/24/2018
just like many of you.. to get some points
0 Comments, 1 Views,
1 Votes
,2.40 Score
|
|
Startling Sex 11/19/2018
A man was having problems with premature ejaculation so
he decided to go to the doctor. He asked the doctor what could
he do to cure his problem ... <br><br>
In response the doctor said, "When you feel like you
are getting ready to ejaculate try startling yourself."
That same day the man went to the store and bought himself
a starter pistol. All excited to try this ...
1 Comments, 61 Views,
10 Votes
,3.39 Score
|
|
Fun 11/16/2018
Does anyone find fun times on here more then 1 out of 10? Lots
of flakes
2 Comments, 16 Views,
8 Votes
,1.16 Score
|
|
Friday fun day 11/16/2018
what do you call a wondering caveman? <br><br>
<br><br>
a meanderthal!! <br><br>
<br><br>
ok all I got
0 Comments, 4 Views,
4 Votes
,2.08 Score
|
|
let see who this one pisses off! ha 11/15/2018
SO my mom once told me to marry a woman with a large embarrassing
tattoo. thats someone thats not afraid to make a big mistake
and stick by it. <br><br>
ok let me have it hahah!
0 Comments, 7 Views,
5 Votes
,0.86 Score
|
|
Tuesday humor 11/13/2018
so my friend just told me I was the cheapest person he has
ever met, I'm not buying it!!! <br><br>
HAHA
0 Comments, 5 Views,
4 Votes
,1.30 Score
|
|
Why married women are heavier than single women 11/12/2018
Q. Why are married women heavier than single women? <br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
A. Single women come home, see what's in the fridge
and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in
bed and go to the fridge... lol
0 Comments, 28 Views,
15 Votes
,3.74 Score
|
|
Nuns at the Hospital 11/12/2018
A man suffered a serious heart attack and had bypass surgery.
He awakened to find himself in the care of nuns at a Catholic
hospital. As he was recovering, a nun asked how he was going
to the bill. He replied, in a raspy voice, "No health
insurance." The nun asked if he had money in the bank.
He replied, "No money in the bank." The nun asked,
"Do you have a relative who ...
0 Comments, 95 Views,
15 Votes
,4.05 Score
|
|
home sick 11/12/2018
A trucker who has been out on the road for two months stops
at a brothel outside Atlanta. He walks straight up to the
Madam, drops down $500 and says, “I want your ugliest
woman and a grilled cheese sandwich!” The Madam is astonished.
“But sir, for that kind of money you could have one of my
prettiest ladies and a three-course meal.” The trucker
replies, “Listen darlin’, not horny ...
0 Comments, 56 Views,
12 Votes
,3.15 Score
|
|
genie 11/12/2018
Two Men were out fishing when one decides to have a smoke
He asks the other guy if he has a lighter He replies “Yes
I do!” and hands the other a 10 inch long BIC lighter Surprised
the guy asks “Where did you get this?” The guy replies
“Oh I have a personal genie.” The first man asks “Can
I make a wish? ” Sure says the other man “Just make sure
that you speak clearly cause he is ...
1 Comments, 57 Views,
10 Votes
,2.59 Score
|
|
second opinion 11/12/2018
“A man and his wife were having a big argument at breakfast.
He shouted at her, “You aren’t so good in bed either!”
Then stormed off to work. By mid-morning, he decided he’d better make amends and
called home. “What took you so long to answer?” he asked.
“I was in bed, ” she replied. “What were you doing in bed this late?” “Getting a second opinion.”
1 Comments, 24 Views,
12 Votes
,2.09 Score
|
|
little sister 11/12/2018
A man and his wife were having sex one night in there bedroom.
There little boy opens the door and says " what
are you doing to mama?" Then the says "Making
you a little sister" And then the boy replies "Hell
no do it doggy style I want a puppy."
0 Comments, 14 Views,
8 Votes
,2.09 Score
|
|
Give me one 11/12/2018
This guy is married and his wife knows he is a bit of a cranky
pants. They go out together on a night out. They go to the
restaurant and order a nice meal. Midway through he calls
the waiter and says, "Is there any such thing as a decent
glass of wine to go with this dinner, if so give me one."
Then they go to a pub where he calls to the barman, "Is
there any such thing as pints of ...
1 Comments, 63 Views,
10 Votes
,2.99 Score
|
|
Just a Veteran Sharing a View Point 11/12/2018
Sometimes it is PAINFULLY obvious that being a Marine is
like working in a whorehouse. . . <br><br>
THE BETTER YOU PERFORM, THE MORE YOU GET FUCKED!!!!!!!!!!!!!
0 Comments, 10 Views,
7 Votes
,1.00 Score
|
|
Southern girls 11/9/2018
Q ... Do you know why there are so few virgins in the south
? <br><br>
. A ... Because it takes so long to say "Quiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit."
1 Comments, 22 Views,
12 Votes
,1.92 Score
|
|
im chat is pants that bad its not funny 11/8/2018
my joke is chat
0 Comments, 14 Views,
8 Votes
,1.39 Score
|
|
hump day joke 11/7/2018
what do they call 50 cent in Zimbabwe? 400 million dollars!!!
<br><br>
not bad but a start
0 Comments, 0 Views,
0 Votes
|
|
erotic vs. kinky 11/5/2018
What is the difference between erotic and kinky? <br><br>
Erotic is using a feather. Kinky is using the whole chicken.
2 Comments, 12 Views,
8 Votes
,4.17 Score
|
|
joke 11/1/2018
White guy using urinal, guy comes in to use one next to him
and says "wow, I just made it!". WG guy says"
can you make me one in white"
0 Comments, 20 Views,
7 Votes
,1.00 Score
|
|
Football Joke #3 11/1/2018
Q: What is the difference between a New England Patriots
fan and a baby? <br><br>
<br><br>
A: The baby will stop whining after awhile.
0 Comments, 18 Views,
9 Votes
,2.57 Score
|
|
Football Joke #2 11/1/2018
Q: Did you guys hear about the NFL player who hits women?
<br><br>
<br><br>
A: No the other one. No the other one.
0 Comments, 12 Views,
7 Votes
,1.26 Score
|
|
Football Joke #1 11/1/2018
Q: Did you here about the Packer fan that died at a pie eating
contest? <br><br>
<br><br>
A: The cow kicked him in the head!
0 Comments, 14 Views,
6 Votes
,0.80 Score
|
|
Sex Tip 10/29/2018
One day, Carl was in the bathroom using the urinal when his
coworker Derrick walked in. Carl glanced over and asked
Derrick "How did you get your dick so big?" Derrick
chuckled an said "You put it in real fast, and pull
it out real slow" Carl went home, and made love to his
wife using Derrick's advice. "Anything different
you noticed?" Carl asked his wife. ...
0 Comments, 6 Views,
1 Votes
,1.10 Score
|
|
Getting a new Bra 10/29/2018
A flat chested young woman goes out looking for a new bra
one day. <br><br>
She tries shop after shop trying to find a size 28A yet she
can't get one anywhere. Finally, in desperation, she tries her fortunes in a little
unmentionables shop run by a woman who's hard of hearing.
<br><br>
"Have you got anything in size 28A?" asks the
young woman. ...
1 Comments, 97 Views,
16 Votes
,2.69 Score
|
|
A little girl and boy.. 10/28/2018
are fighting about the differences between the sexes,
and which one is better. Finally, the boy drops his pants
and says, “Here’s something I have that you’ll never
have!” The little girl is pretty upset by this, since
it is clearly true, and runs home crying. A while later,
she comes running back with a smile on her face. She drops
her pants and says, “My mommy says that with one of ...
0 Comments, 15 Views,
4 Votes
,2.86 Score
|
|
Why did I get divorced? 10/28/2018
Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn't wish
me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my .
I went to work and even my colleagues didn't wish me
a happy birthday. As I entered my office, my secretary said,
"Happy birthday, boss!" I felt so special.
She asked me out for lunch. After lunch, she invited me to
her apartment. We went there and she said, "Do you ...
0 Comments, 18 Views,
3 Votes
,1.96 Score
|
|
A teacher is teaching a class... 10/28/2018
and she sees that Johnny isn't paying attention, so
she asks him, "If there are three ducks sitting on
a fence, and you shoot one, how many are left?" Johnny
says, "None." The teacher asks, "Why?"
Johnny says, "Because the shot scared them all off."
The teacher says, "No, two, but I like how you're
thinking." Johnny asks the teacher, ...
0 Comments, 15 Views,
1 Votes
,2.40 Score
|
|
A family is at the dinner table... 10/28/2018
The asks the father, “Dad, how many kinds of boobs
are there?” The father, surprised, answers, “Well,
, a woman goes through three phases. In her 20s, a woman’s
breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her 30s and 40s,
they are like pears, still nice, hanging a bit. After 50,
they are like onions.” “Onions?” the asks. “Yes.
You see them and they make you cry.” This ...
0 Comments, 13 Views,
1 Votes
,1.10 Score
|
|
A mother is in the kitchen... 10/28/2018
making dinner for her family when her walks in.
“Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother thinks
for a few seconds and says, “Well dear, Mommy and Daddy
fall in love and get married. One night they go into their
bedroom, they kiss and hug, and have sex.” The
looks puzzled so the mother continues, “That means the
daddy puts his penis in the mommy’s vagina. That’s
how you get ...
0 Comments, 13 Views,
3 Votes
,2.45 Score
|
|
wife 10/27/2018
What do you call a woman with no clit?? <br><br>
<br><br>
........ <br><br>
Nothing she won't cum anyway!! lol
0 Comments, 31 Views,
15 Votes
,3.28 Score
|
|
Hillbilly 10/27/2018
We all know why the chicken crossed the road.. Why did the hillbilly cross the road??? <br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
. Cause his dick was stuck in the chicken!!!
1 Comments, 24 Views,
11 Votes
,2.05 Score
|
|
boomerang 10/27/2018
What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back???????
<br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
. <br><br>
A STICK
0 Comments, 11 Views,
9 Votes
,2.14 Score
|
|
My Favorite because my Grandmother told me this one 10/24/2018
Little Johnny and Susie were good friends and always ate
lunch at school together. Not only that, but they both always
brought chicken sandwiches for lunch. One day Susie shows
up at lunch with a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Johnny
asks, where's your chicken sandwich? Susie replied,
my mom said if I keep eating chicken sandwiches that I am
going to turn into a chicken. Well this ...
0 Comments, 96 Views,
18 Votes
,3.40 Score
|
|
What is the cheapest meat you can buy? 10/24/2018
Deer testicles. You get 2 under a buck.
1 Comments, 15 Views,
9 Votes
,2.57 Score
|
|
Haloween Party 10/24/2018
A couple were invited to a swanky family masked fancy dress
Halloween party. The wife got a terrible headache and told her husband to
go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested,
but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin
and go to bed and there was no need for his good time to be spoiled
by not going. <br><br>
So he took his costume and away he went. ...
1 Comments, 66 Views,
7 Votes
,4.31 Score
|
|
Didn't wanna see /-/er huh. 10/21/2018
A man left for work one Friday afternoon. But, being pay-day,
instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend
partying with the boys and spending his entire pay check.
When he finally appeared at home, Sunday night, he was confronted
by a very angry wife X)and was barraged for nearly
two hours with a tirade befitting his actions. Finally his wife stopped the nagging and simply ...
0 Comments, 60 Views,
6 Votes
,2.51 Score
|
|
Sex Talk 10/21/2018
Two women are discussing life in the retirement village
they live in with their spouses and how they like it. One
woman tells the other that she misses sex though to which
the other replies that her and her hubby still have sex whenever
she wants. The first woman asks how and the second woman
says every so often when he's in the bathroom getting
ready for bed she gets naked and lays on the ...
0 Comments, 75 Views,
11 Votes
,1.86 Score
|
|
Joke 10/19/2018
Three tampons are standing outside liquor store. What
do they say to each other? “Nothing. They’re stuck up cunts.”
1 Comments, 17 Views,
10 Votes
,2.59 Score
|
|
joke 10/19/2018
why are we all on here...it really a bit of a joke isn't
it?
2 Comments, 9 Views,
3 Votes
,2.45 Score
|
|
PHILOSOPHY 10/19/2018
Foolish man gives wife grand piano. Wise man gives wife upright organ. <br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
...
2 Comments, 14 Views,
7 Votes
,3.55 Score
|
|
Harry and his wife 10/18/2018
Harry and his wife are having hard financial times, so they
decide that she’ll become a . She’s not quite
sure what to do, so Harry says, “Stand in front of that
bar and pick up a guy. Tell him that you charge a hundred bucks.
If you got a question, I’ll be parked around the corner.”
<br><br> She’s standing there for 5 minutes when a guy pulls up
and asks, “How much?” ...
1 Comments, 84 Views,
13 Votes
,4.65 Score
|
|
Mr. Schwartz 10/18/2018
While examining the body of Mr. Schwartz, a mortician notices
that Schwartz has the largest penis he has ever seen. “I’m
sorry, Mr. Schwartz, ” says the mortician, “But I
can’t send you to be cremated with a tremendously huge
penis like this. It has to be saved for posterity.” <br><br>
The mortician removes the penis, places it in a jar and puts
the jar in his briefcase. ...
1 Comments, 69 Views,
10 Votes
,3.98 Score
|
|
Jokes? 10/16/2018
Any good sex jokes? Has anybody ever told a joke during sex?
0 Comments, 0 Views,
0 Votes
|
|
The Millionaire 10/14/2018
A man asked a waiter to take a bottle of Merlot to an unusually
attractive woman sitting alone at a table in a cozy little
restaurant. <br><br>
The waiter took the Merlot to the woman and said, 'This
is from the gentleman who is seated over there.'....
and indicated the sender with a nod of his head. <br><br>
She stared at the wine coolly for a few seconds, not ...
1 Comments, 94 Views,
10 Votes
,4.38 Score
|
|
Closed..Oob 10/13/2018
What does the sign on an out-of-business brothel say? Beat it. We’re closed.
3 Comments, 30 Views,
15 Votes
,4.05 Score
|
|
rthtrhrt htrh rt htrh rthr 10/13/2018
rt hrt httrh rth trh rt htr hrt.rh rt htrh trh rt hrt htr hrth
r, rth rt trh rth rt . wrgf ergEF EFG EQGH EGHQEW TRH T HTRHWR
HTW RH. WETHGTRHRTHRTHRT, HRTHRTH RT rthrtr r rrthrthrehryhyrhtyth.
yjrte gerg trgrtghtrhrgsbr, grt grtbgrtgbrtgbr grtg
df bwfe bsef gef ws. rtgbrtgbtr rt brt, re brtbtr btr tr.
rtb rt btr btrgtrbbrgbrfbws.bfbgtbgvgrverbvettr, bgerbvgrevgrevgveqagrevwrecrqegvqerv, ...
0 Comments, 10 Views,
3 Votes
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Tuesday fun? 10/9/2018
if CON is the opposite of PRO the CONGRESS is the opposite
of PROGRESS? <br><br>
may not be a joke but kinda sure.
0 Comments, 1 Views,
1 Votes
,2.40 Score
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|
monday jokes? 10/8/2018
ill start <br><br>
I need a prescription for like 1/2 my cabinets, the rest
are over the counter. <br><br>
who's next??
0 Comments, 4 Views,
2 Votes
,0.34 Score
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|
Senior Night 10/7/2018
It was entertainment night at the senior citizens center.
<br><br>
After the community sing-along led by Alice at the piano,
it was time for the star of the show, Claude the Hypnotist!
Claude explained that he was going to put the whole audience
into a trance. “Yes, each and every one of you and all at
the same time” said Claude. <br><br>
The excited chatter dropped ...
0 Comments, 82 Views,
12 Votes
,2.45 Score
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Bridge to Hawaii 10/7/2018
A man in California is walking along the beach and finds
a very old bottle with a cork in the opening. So he pulls out
the cork and out pops a Genie! The genie says, thank you for
letting me out, as I have been stuck in here for over 200 years!
To show my appreciation I can grant you one wish. So the man
thought about it, then said "I want to take a 2 week
vacation in Hawaii. No problem ...
0 Comments, 59 Views,
10 Votes
,1.19 Score
|
|
Pussy lips 10/7/2018
After years of frequent sex, a Blonde noticed that her pussy
lips were elongated and hung down from her body. This embarrased
her greatly, so she went to see a surgeon to see if it could
be fixed. The surgeon said "No problem, we fix this
all the time". The blonde said "OK, lets do it,
but I am very embarrased about this so you can't tell
a soul about it. No one can ...
1 Comments, 90 Views,
12 Votes
,3.33 Score
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Dentist chair 10/7/2018
A very short Blonde goes to the destist. The assistant has
her sit in the dentist chair. A few minutes later the dentist
comes in, walks up to her and says "Open Wide".
" I cant't" says the Blond, "the chair
arms are in the way".
0 Comments, 31 Views,
9 Votes
,2.14 Score
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|
Inside 10/6/2018
Three men are travelling through the desert when their
single camel dies. They walk for a while but then it becomes
night. Desperate for shelter, suddenly they stumble across
a tent and inside is three beautiful women. The men were
not only lost but horny too so they begin to have sex with
the women. But the tent belongs to a prince and these three
women were his wives so he is very angry when he ...
0 Comments, 79 Views,
12 Votes
,2.80 Score
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Knocking on doors 10/4/2018
What is Jehovah's witness' favorite band? The
Doors. <br><br>
source: http://SEXFinder.com.com
0 Comments, 3 Views,
1 Votes
,2.40 Score
|
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you're BI 10/4/2018
all men and women are BI.... its up to you to guess if its POLAR or SEXUAL!!!!!
0 Comments, 6 Views,
3 Votes
,2.45 Score
|
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Help me out 10/4/2018
A guy is just looking to laugh. Cheer me up and drop your jokes
here. I look forward to seeing them.
0 Comments, 3 Views,
3 Votes
,0.98 Score
|
|
Whistling while peeing 10/3/2018
Why does a Blonde whistle while she is peeing? So she can
remember which lips to wipe when she is done.
0 Comments, 3 Views,
2 Votes
,1.04 Score
|
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Quickie 10/3/2018
A male Blonde goes to a cafe for breakfast and looks at the
menu. Soon a very cute waitress comes up and says "What
would you like today sir?" He said "A quickie".
Disgusted , she walks away. But in a few minutes she calms
down and trys again. But he again says he would like a quickie.
This time she slaps his face and walks away. Soon the man
at the next table says ...
1 Comments, 44 Views,
4 Votes
,3.63 Score
|
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Brazilian 10/3/2018
A redhead tells her Blonde stepsister "I fucked a
Brazilian last night." "Oh my!" said
the Blonde. "How many is that?"
0 Comments, 3 Views,
2 Votes
,1.04 Score
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An Evening Out 10/3/2018
Patton staggered home very late after another evening
with his drinking buddy, Paddy. He took off his shoes to
avoid waking his wife, Kathleen. <br><br>
He tiptoed as quietly as he could toward the stairs leading
to their upstairs bedroom, but misjudged the bottom step.
As he caught himself by grabbing the banister, his body
swung around and he landed heavily on his rump. A whiskey ...
0 Comments, 39 Views,
3 Votes
,3.43 Score
|
|
Blonde virginity 10/3/2018
How do you tell when a blonde has lost her virginity? Her
crayons are sticky.
0 Comments, 7 Views,
2 Votes
,2.42 Score
|
|
Tax Time 10/1/2018
A woman walks into an accountant's office and tells
him that she needs to file her taxes. <br><br>
The accountant says, "Before we begin, I'll
need to ask you a few uestions." He gets her name, address,
Social security number, etc. and then asks, "What's
your occupation?" <br><br> "I'm a Lady of the night, " she says. ...
1 Comments, 50 Views,
4 Votes
,3.25 Score
|
|
monday jokes 10/1/2018
Ok people who can start this Monday off great with some funny
shit??
0 Comments, 1 Views,
1 Votes
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Kevin had shingles. 9/28/2018
Those of us who spend much time in a doctor's office
should appreciate this! Doesn't it seem more and more
that physicians are running their practices like an assembly
line? <br><br>
Here's what happened to Kevin: <br><br>
Kevin walked into a doctor's office and the receptionist
asked him what he had. Kevin said: 'Shingles.'
So, she wrote down his ...
1 Comments, 45 Views,
7 Votes
,2.79 Score
|
|
Peggy Sue 9/27/2018
It was a hot Saturday evening in the summer of 1958 and Fred
had a date with Peggy Sue. He arrived at her house and rang
the bell. <br><br> "Oh, come on in!" Peggy Sue's mother said
as she welcomed Fred in."So, what are you and Peggy
planning to do tonight?" she asked. <br><br>
"Oh, probably catch a movie, and then maybe grab a
bite to eat at ...
1 Comments, 70 Views,
7 Votes
,3.30 Score
|
|
Breakfast Order 9/27/2018
An old man goes into Sarasota’s Broken Egg restaurant
and is seated. All the waitresses are gorgeous. A particularly
voluptuous waitress, wearing a very short skirt and legs
that won’t quit, came to his table and asked if he was ready
to order. "What would you like, sir?” <br><br>
He looks at the menu and then scans her beautiful frame top
to bottom, and answers, ...
2 Comments, 62 Views,
9 Votes
,3.00 Score
|
|
A young woman goes to a bar 9/24/2018
A young woman goes to a bar on Saturday night and ends up drinking
with 5 guys who are roomates. When the bar closed they wwere
all having so much fun that the young men asks her to join
them. As the night wore on she ended up fucking each guy at
least 3 times. So on Sunday morning, she goes to mass and
then confession. She said "Father I have sinned".
What did you do the priest ...
4 Comments, 83 Views,
13 Votes
,3.81 Score
|
|
Lights out 9/21/2018
Joes and Sue had been married for 30 years, and in those 30
years, they always left the lights off when having sex.
He was embarrassed and scared that he couldn't please
her, so he always used a big dildo on her. All these years
she had no clue. One day, she decided to reach over and flip
the light switch on and saw that he was using a dildo. She
said "I knew it, Joe please explain the ...
1 Comments, 66 Views,
13 Votes
,3.65 Score
|
|
Question... 9/19/2018
If we say that guys that are gay but haven't admitted
it are "in the closet, " can we say that lesbians
who have yet to admit it are in the "liquor cabinet?"
1 Comments, 5 Views,
1 Votes
,2.40 Score
|
|
Huge joke 9/17/2018
Your mom.. also some points
2 Comments, 21 Views,
5 Votes
,3.14 Score
|
|
A trip to the market. 9/17/2018
It was a cool and rainy day but still I had to make a trip to
the market for some thing to eat for the next few days. As
I entered the super market I noticed on the stand right in
the door way some large plastic sleeves. I knew immediately
what they were but couldn't decide why they were in
that location. Sooo I asked the clerk who was working near
by why the huge condoms were at the door ...
1 Comments, 56 Views,
5 Votes
,0.53 Score
|
|
Limerick 9/16/2018
There was a young man from Kent.............Whose tool
was decidedly bent......................To save himself
trouble.......He put it in double......... And instead
of cumming he went
2 Comments, 15 Views,
6 Votes
,0.80 Score
|
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sunday 9/16/2018
no better day for a joke than Sunday!! who wants to start??
0 Comments, 5 Views,
3 Votes
,1.47 Score
|
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bad dating ad 9/13/2018
Male drinks only to excess. Seeking female to cook clean
and for sex. Must have own boat and motor. Please send photo
of boat and motor
2 Comments, 27 Views,
14 Votes
,1.54 Score
|
|
thursday jokes 9/13/2018
ill start, I love my hands because I can always count on them!!
who is next??
0 Comments, 6 Views,
5 Votes
,1.51 Score
|
|
thursday jokes 9/13/2018
ill start, I love my hands because I can always count on them!!
who is next??
1 Comments, 10 Views,
4 Votes
,1.69 Score
|
|
Hitchhiker 9/12/2018
A hitchhiker is trying to get a ride. He gets passed by many
cars. Finally a car pulls over to give him a ride. After getting
in the car the hitchhiker turns to the driver and asks: <br><br>
Hitchhiker: "Sir, why did you pick me up when everyone
else passed me by? I mean, what are the chances, really,
that I'm some crazed serial killer?" <br><br>
Driver: ...
0 Comments, 67 Views,
14 Votes
,1.86 Score
|
|
Hitchhiker 9/12/2018
A hitchhiker is trying to get a ride. He gets passed by many
cars. Finally a car pulls over to give him a ride. After getting
in the car the hitchhiker turns to the driver and asks: <br><br>
Hitchhiker: "Sir, why did you pick me up when everyone
else passed me by? I mean, what are the chances, really,
that I'm some crazed serial killer?" <br><br>
Driver: ...
3 Comments, 26 Views,
9 Votes
,1.72 Score
|
|
Hillary Clinton 9/7/2018
A presidential plane crashes, killing the passengers:
George Bush, Barack Obama, and Hillary Clinton. When the
three get to heaven and meet God... <br><br>
George Bush says "Hello, sir, my name is George Bush
and I was the 43rd president of the United States."
<br><br>
Barack Obama says "Hello, sir, my name is Barack Obama
and I was the 44th president of ...
1 Comments, 79 Views,
14 Votes
,1.06 Score
|
|
Peeing in the snow 9/7/2018
Two families live next to each other. One snowy afternoon
the father of the first family gets the father of the second
family, and leads him behind their houses to see something.
<br><br> "See that?" the first father asked. <br><br>
"What? My 's name in the snow? What boy doesn't
write his name in the snow?" answered the second father. ...
2 Comments, 69 Views,
10 Votes
,2.19 Score
|
|
Mother-in-law gift 9/7/2018
My wife asked what we were going to give her mother for Christmas.
I said "nothing, she never used what we gave her last
Christmas." My wife said "What did we give her
last Christmas?" I replied "A tombstone."
4 Comments, 28 Views,
8 Votes
,1.62 Score
|
|
Hotdogs 9/7/2018
I once heard it said... <br><br> "I don't care if you're the Queen of England
or a skin-flick scream queen, when a woman eats a hot-dog,
she looks like a ." <br><br> Not sure I agree with this one, but it does make you go...
"Hmm?"
2 Comments, 22 Views,
9 Votes
,0.86 Score
|
|
Gorilla goo! 9/7/2018
A guy takes his pet gorilla to the vet and the vet says, "She
sure is small for a gorilla!" <br><br>
"That's funny, that's what my friends
say about my wife!" <br><br>
The man replied.
2 Comments, 46 Views,
6 Votes
,1.94 Score
|
|
All the wayyyyYYYyyyyyyyYYYYYyyyyyyyYYYYyyyyy 9/6/2018
What has one leg, and can run along way and NOT get tired ?
<br><br>
<br><br>
 <br><br>
<br><br>
 <br><br>
[image] <br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
 <br><br>
A **Run** in a Woman*z Stocking !
1 Comments, 32 Views,
11 Votes
,2.98 Score
|
|
Wow thats a lot 9/6/2018
Two women were sitting in a bar talking when one spoke up
and said "Oh, I set a new record today, I screwed a Brazilian
today". "WOW, " replied her friend,
"A Brazilian, That's a lot of screwing."
"I only screwed about a thousand."
3 Comments, 29 Views,
5 Votes
,2.49 Score
|
|
She couldn't do it, ssssoooo,,, 9/4/2018
A blonde phoned her boyfriend sounding totally frustrated.
She was trying to do a jigsaw puzzle all by herself. Her boyfriend, on receiving the phone-call, told her to
calm down and he'd be over to help her with the jigsaw.
He asked her what the picture on the front of the box was and
she had answered, "It's a big chicken".
On arriving at his ...
1 Comments, 63 Views,
10 Votes
,3.58 Score
|
|
Turner Brown 9/4/2018
Skinny little white Irishman gets into an elevator, looks
up and sees this HUGE black guy standing next to him. <br><br>
The big guy sees the little Irishman staring at him... He
looks down at the Irishman <br><br>
and says: "7 ft tall, 350 pounds, 20 inch
penis, 6 pounds of testicles, Turner Brown"
<br><br>
The ...
2 Comments, 51 Views,
8 Votes
,4.41 Score
|
|
New and Hopefully ][mproved 9/3/2018
An man in his mid-eighties struggles to get up from
the couch then starts putting on his coat. His wife, seeing
the unexpected behavior, asks, "Where are you going?" He replies,
" going to the doctor."
She says, "Why, are you sick?"
He says, "Nope, going to get me some of that ...
5 Comments, 68 Views,
17 Votes
,2.98 Score
|
|
Speaka da Engrish 9/3/2018
A bus stops and 2 Italian men get on. They sit down
and engage in an animated conversation. The lady sitting next to them ignores them at first, But
her attention is galvanized when she hears one of them say the following: " Emma come first.
Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-more!
. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee
twice. ...
1 Comments, 44 Views,
10 Votes
,4.18 Score
|
|
Make it back and tell,,, 9/3/2018
A couple made a deal that whoever died first would come back
and inform the other if there was sex after death. Their biggest fear was that there was no after-life at all.
After a long life together, the husband was the first to
die. True to his word, he made the first contact: "Sue..........Sue".
<br><br>
Is that you, George?" ...
3 Comments, 54 Views,
11 Votes
,2.98 Score
|
|
Visit to psychologist 2 8/29/2018
Rorschach test! <br><br>
Psychologist shows ink blot <br><br>
What is that? A naked woman! <br><br>
Another blot. What is that? A naked woman's genitals. <br><br>
Another blot. What is that? 2 naked women & a man with erection <br><br>
Another blot What is that? A couple having sex. <br><br>
That is proof you have a ...
1 Comments, 50 Views,
11 Votes
,2.61 Score
|
|
Visit to psychologist 1 8/29/2018
Irishman visits psychologist who show him a picture of
an oak, an ash & a poplar. Asks what does that remind
you of? <br><br> 9 Tree & tree & tree makes 9 <br><br>
A story follows A dos wees against each tree. What does that
remind you of? <br><br> 99 Dirty tree , dirty tree & dirty tree makes 99 <br><br>
Story continues The then ...
2 Comments, 46 Views,
9 Votes
,1.50 Score
|
|
Missing 8/27/2018
The wife's been missing for a week now <br><br>
The Police said to expect the worst <br><br>
So I went down the Charity Shop and got her clothes back......
2 Comments, 37 Views,
12 Votes
,2.09 Score
|
|
wife & girlfriend 8/27/2018
Q: What's the difference between a wife & a girlfriend?
<br><br>
A: 40 pounds
4 Comments, 25 Views,
11 Votes
,3.92 Score
|
|
more 8/27/2018
And if they say they are not cheetahs...they are lion.
0 Comments, 10 Views,
3 Votes
,2.94 Score
|
|
Poker in the jungle. 8/25/2018
<br><br>
1 WHY DON’T THEY PLAY POKER IN THE JUNGLE? Too many cheetahs.
1 Comments, 22 Views,
13 Votes
,2.14 Score
|
|
Ahhhh Man, what next 8/22/2018
I went to a bar one night and about two in the morning when
the woman previously rated two becomes a nine. I finally
asked her to my hotel room to which she quickly agreed to
with a soft squeeze on my cock and I told her all right by returning
a squeeze in her booty. Once there I undressed and lay on
the bed while she undressed. Wellll first came off the wig,
and she placed it on the ...
1 Comments, 80 Views,
14 Votes
,2.50 Score
|
|
late Monday jokes 8/21/2018
Ok I missed Monday, lets have them..I need something funny!!
0 Comments, 0 Views,
0 Votes
|
|
Sex & Calories 8/18/2018
They say that during sex you burn off as many calories as
running 8 miles. <br><br>
Who the hell runs 8 miles in 45 seconds?
1 Comments, 20 Views,
10 Votes
,2.39 Score
|
|
jokes 8/18/2018
i like that theres a joke section on here
0 Comments, 10 Views,
7 Votes
,2.02 Score
|
|
Testing, Testing, 4, 5, 6, Testing. 8/17/2018
THE ANSWERS TO ALL FIVE OF THE RIDDLES ARE BELOW:
1. The third room. Lions that haven't eaten in three
years are dead. That one was easy, right? 2. The woman was a photographer. She shot a picture of her
husband, developed it, and hung it up to dry (shot; held
under water; and hung). 3. Charcoal, as it is used in barbecuing. 4. Sure you can name three consecutive days, yesterday, ...
3 Comments, 53 Views,
13 Votes
,1.47 Score
|
|
Sex & Calories 8/16/2018
They say that during sex you burn off as many calories as
running 8 miles. <br><br>
Who the hell runs 8 miles in 45 seconds?
1 Comments, 14 Views,
6 Votes
,2.23 Score
|
|
What do you call a cow with no legs? 8/16/2018
Ground beef!
0 Comments, 0 Views,
0 Votes
|
|
need some laughter 8/16/2018
who has one? lets get some funny going!!!
0 Comments, 0 Views,
0 Votes
|
|
thursday fun 8/16/2018
So it to vegans get in a fight is it still considered beef?
0 Comments, 1 Views,
0 Votes
|
|
ORIGINAL 8/15/2018
ORIGINAL
1 Comments, 12 Views,
6 Votes
,1.09 Score
|
|
Joke of the weeks and ARE MEANT AS JOKES ONLY!!!!!! 8/14/2018
Q: Which of the following does "not" belong:
Meat, Eggs, Wife, or Blowjob? A: a blowjob, because you can beat your meat, eggs, and wife
but you Can't beat a blowjob!! LOL
2 Comments, 18 Views,
7 Votes
,3.04 Score
|
|
Honey Do 8/14/2018
A guy walks into a sperm donor bank wearing a ski mask and
holding a gun. He goes up to the nurse and demands her to open the sperm bank
vault. She says "But sir, its just a sperm bank!", "I
don't care, open it now!!!" he replies. So she opens the door to the vault and inside are all the sperm
samples. <br><br>
The guy says "Take one of those sperm samples ...
0 Comments, 34 Views,
2 Votes
,1.73 Score
|
|
Testing, Testing, 1 2 3 ,,, Testing. 8/14/2018
THIS IS ONE OF THE BEST FIVE RIDDLES I'VE SEEN.... RIDDLE
#5 IS AMAZING. IT SHARPENS THOSE GENES IN YOUR BRAIN AND
STALLS ALZHEIMER'S FOR YEARS !! <br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
1. A murderer is condemned to death. He has to choose between
three rooms. The first is full of raging fires, the second
is full of ...
2 Comments, 58 Views,
6 Votes
,1.94 Score
|
|
SHoe*z, S//-/oe*z and yet S]]-[[oe*z again 8/13/2018
<br><br>
A young blonde woman was driving through the Florida Everglades while on vacation. She wanted to take home a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to the high prices the local vendors were asking. After becoming very frustrated with the attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the young Blonde declared, "Well then, maybe ...
2 Comments, 52 Views,
10 Votes
,3.98 Score
|
|
monday 8/13/2018
anyone got one that will get this week started off right?
lets have them
0 Comments, 4 Views,
1 Votes
,1.10 Score
|
|
Don't be in such a hurry ! 8/13/2018
A young ][ndian Brave felt he was of age. He went to the Village Chief and stood before him. ''Oh Chief, ][ Am of age now and ask to become a Warrior,
What must ][ do ?" The Chief looked hard at the young Brave and thought a few
moment*z. " To Be a WarrioR, there are 3 thing*z You must do.
The first , ,, is to build a Big and Strong TePee The second, ,, is to get a ...
2 Comments, 54 Views,
8 Votes
,3.01 Score
|
|
A Loving Wife 8/10/2018
A man breaks into a house to look for money and guns. Inside,
he finds a couple in bed. He orders the guy out of the bed and
ties him to a chair. While tying the home owner’s wife
to the bed, the convict gets on top of her, kisses her neck;
then gets up & goes into the bathroom. <br><br>
While he's in there, the husband whispers over to his
wife: “Listen, this guy is an ...
3 Comments, 101 Views,
20 Votes
,4.15 Score
|
|
Square Root 8/10/2018
What is the square root of 69? <br><br>
8 something...
1 Comments, 30 Views,
12 Votes
,2.27 Score
|
|
Friday fun day 8/10/2018
Ok peeps! who has a joke to get the weekend started right?
0 Comments, 3 Views,
2 Votes
,2.42 Score
|
|
humor 8/9/2018
how do ya tell a snowman apart from a snow woman? snowballs.
2 Comments, 10 Views,
7 Votes
,2.28 Score
|
|
Wrong A\/\swer ! 8/9/2018
A man left for work one Friday afternoon. But, being -day, instead of going home, he stayed out
the entire weekend partying with the boys and spending
his entire check. When he finally appeared at home, Sunday night, he was confronted
by a very angry wife and was barraged for nearly two hours
with a tirade befitting his actions. Finally his wife stopped the nagging and simply said to ...
2 Comments, 67 Views,
11 Votes
,3.54 Score
|
|
When too, and when NOT too. 8/9/2018
<br><br>
In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney
called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman
to the stand. He approached her and asked, ''Mrs. Jones,
do you know ?'' She responded, ''Why, yes, I do know you,
Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and
frankly, you've been a big disappointment ...
0 Comments, 44 Views,
8 Votes
,3.01 Score
|
|
Not All Is As It Appear*z ~ 8/9/2018
Farmer Brown goes out one day and buys a brand new stud rooster
for his Henhouse. The cocky young rooster walks over to the rooster and
says: "OK, fellow, time to retire."
The rooster says: "You can't handle all
these chickens, look what it did to !" The young rooster replies: "Now don't give a hassle about this
man. It's time ...
0 Comments, 48 Views,
5 Votes
,3.80 Score
|
|
Souper Visor 8/9/2018
Cajun Math.......... A Cajun Shrimper wants
a job cleaning up the oil spill, but the BP Foreman won't hire him until he passes a little
math test. "Here is your first question..."
the foreman said. "Without using numbers, represent
the number 9." "Without numbers ?" The
Cajun says, "Dat's is easy." And proceeds to draw ...
0 Comments, 42 Views,
5 Votes
,1.84 Score
|
|
Tree Hugg'in. 8/8/2018
While walking through Golden Gate Park in San Francisco,
a man came upon another man hugging a tree with his ear firmly
against the tree . Seeing this he inquired, "Just out of curiosity, what
the heck are you doing?" <br><br>
" listening to the music of the tree, "
the other man replied. "you've got to be kidding
." "No, would you like ...
1 Comments, 45 Views,
6 Votes
,2.23 Score
|
|
Careful \\/\\/is//-/e*z ! 8/8/2018
A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich
behind him. The waitress asks them for their orders. The man says, "A hamburger, fries and a coke, "
and turns to the ostrich, "What's yours?" "I'll have the same, " says the ostrich.
A short time later the waitress returns with the order.
“That will be $9.40 please.” The man reaches into ...
0 Comments, 34 Views,
2 Votes
,3.81 Score
|
|
Best Phone rate. 8/8/2018
A gentleman is visiting The Vatican in Rome when
he happen*z to see a Golden Phone. He ask*z a Pradre' that is watching
over it "What*z up with the Golden Phone Padre' ?" The Padre'
replie*z "Oh, that phone goe*z directly to Heaven, and it cost*z $10, 000.00 to use it." The
gentleman is impressed. Same gentleman has travelled
to London England, and just so ...
0 Comments, 35 Views,
3 Votes
,2.45 Score
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Drink'in into Fly*in 8/8/2018
Ralph and Charlie were a couple of Newfie drinking
buddies who worked as airplane mechanics in Gander , NL.
One day the airport was fogged in and they were stuck in the
hangar with nothing to do. <br><br>
Ralph said, "Man, I wish we had something to drink!"
<br><br>
Charlie says "Me too. Y'know, I've heard
you can drink jet fuel and get a ...
0 Comments, 34 Views,
3 Votes
,2.94 Score
|
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?? 8/8/2018
<br><br>
??
0 Comments, 2 Views,
0 Votes
|
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I need some new jokes 8/7/2018
Anyone have some good jokes to share?
1 Comments, 3 Views,
2 Votes
,3.12 Score
|
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Hey whats up 8/6/2018
Just doing this for the points, so feel free to do the same!
1 Comments, 9 Views,
4 Votes
,3.25 Score
|
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Male Logic 8/6/2018
This is a conversation between a husband and his wife. Please
note that she asks five or six questions which he answered
quite simply; but, then she is speechless after answering
only one question. l bet this happens more often than not
to most husbands out there. <br><br>
Woman: Do you drink beer? <br><br>
Man: Yes. <br><br>
Woman: How many beers a day? ...
0 Comments, 38 Views,
5 Votes
,4.12 Score
|
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What Starts With "F" 8/6/2018
A first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble
with one of her more precocious students. The teacher asked,
'Harry, what exactly is your problem?' <br><br>
Harry answered, 'I'm too smart for the 1st grade.
My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm smarter than she
is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!' <br><br>
Ms. Brooks finally had ...
0 Comments, 54 Views,
7 Votes
,4.06 Score
|
|
points 8/6/2018
Points
1 Comments, 3 Views,
1 Votes
|
|
monday 8/6/2018
ok who has the Monday pick me upper??? lets hear them
1 Comments, 4 Views,
2 Votes
,1.04 Score
|
|
OLD JOKE 8/5/2018
What’s the difference between a and a drug dealer?
<br><br> A can wash her crack and sell it again.
1 Comments, 12 Views,
6 Votes
,1.37 Score
|
|
Cheesy pick up lines 8/4/2018
I'll start <br><br>
You remind me of my pinky toe. You're short and thin
and I'll probably bang you on my coffee table tonight
0 Comments, 7 Views,
4 Votes
,2.47 Score
|
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Saturday fun 8/4/2018
Any good ones for a HOT Saturday?
0 Comments, 2 Views,
2 Votes
,2.42 Score
|
|
Blonde 8/3/2018
You hear about the blonde that works at the M&M factory?
<br><br>
She got fired for throwing half of them away because they
said W&W.
0 Comments, 5 Views,
4 Votes
,1.69 Score
|
|
Blonde 8/3/2018
You hear about the blonde that works at the M&M factory?
<br><br>
She got fired for throwing half of them away because they
said W&W.
1 Comments, 9 Views,
5 Votes
,2.49 Score
|
|
ha ha 8/3/2018
so a girl tells a guy come eat my pussy it tastes like rainbows....so
he goes down and starts licking and as he licks skittles
start coming out he comes up with a mouth full and says so
this is what ya meant by it tastes like rainbows
0 Comments, 19 Views,
3 Votes
,1.47 Score
|
|
hump day 8/1/2018
Lets have them, need some laughter today!!!
0 Comments, 2 Views,
1 Votes
,1.10 Score
|
|
monday 7/30/2018
Lets have them folks!!! need some laughter today for sure!!!
4 Comments, 6 Views,
2 Votes
,3.12 Score
|
|
Dopey and the Nun 7/30/2018
Snow White and the 7 dwaves went to visit the Vatican! There,
they were introduced to the Pontiff. Dopey asks, "Monsignor,
are there any dwarf nuns in the Vatican?" <br><br> Pope thinks for a few seconds and says, "No, I don't
believe there are! <br><br> Dopey thinks and asks another question. "Pope, are
there any dawf nuns in the Roman Catholic ...
0 Comments, 50 Views,
10 Votes
,3.19 Score
|
|
donkey 7/28/2018
what do you get when you cross a donkey with a onion a piece
of ass brings a tear too your eye
0 Comments, 9 Views,
5 Votes
,1.84 Score
|
|
Who's down for points people! 7/27/2018
We all need points.
6 Comments, 26 Views,
11 Votes
,4.85 Score
|
|
Three Blondes walk into a bar.... 7/26/2018
two got concussions.
0 Comments, 15 Views,
6 Votes
,1.37 Score
|
|
ha ha!!! 7/25/2018
A lady comes home from her doctor's appointment grinning
from ear to ear. Her husband asks, "Why are you so happy?"
The wife says, "The doctor told me that for a forty-five
year old woman, I have the breasts of a eighteen year old."
"Oh yeah?" quipped her husband, "What
did he say about your forty-five year old ass?" She
said, "Your name never came ...
3 Comments, 40 Views,
16 Votes
,5.63 Score
|
|
Traveling Salesman's Car Breaks Down 7/25/2018
While on the road in the country a door to door salesman had
car trouble and walked to a nearby farmhouse for help. He
got to the door as night was falling on that dark and stormy
night. <br><br> "You can stay the night here, " the old farmer
said, "but you'll have to stay in one of my daughters
bedrooms." <br><br> The first came down she wore ...
1 Comments, 71 Views,
10 Votes
,3.78 Score
|
|
Dentist is scared of women 7/24/2018
A dentist's father raised his alone since his wife
had cheated on him. He always told his to avoid women
like the plague. <br><br> One day, a beautiful woman is shown in to the dentist's
exam room. She is quite flirtatious with the dentist and
makes no secret of the fact that she's interested.
<br><br> She asks the dentist if he'd like to go out ...
0 Comments, 59 Views,
10 Votes
,4.18 Score
|
|
bull!!! 7/24/2018
A blonde and a redhead have a ranch. They have just lost their
bull. The women need to buy another, but only have $500.
The redhead tells the blonde, "I will go to the market
and see if I can find one for under that amount. If I can, I
will send you a telegram." She goes to the market and
finds one for $499. Having only one dollar left, she goes
to the telegraph office and finds out ...
0 Comments, 55 Views,
11 Votes
,5.22 Score
|
|
Tuesday fun 7/24/2018
I want to start a profesional hide and seek game, but good
players are hard to find!! top that one...hahaha
0 Comments, 0 Views,
0 Votes
|
|
codes!!! 7/23/2018
A boy says to a girl, "So, sex at my place?" "Yeah!"
"Okay, but I sleep in a bunk bed with my younger brother,
and he thinks we're making sandwiches, so we have to
have a code. Cheese means faster and tomato means harder, okay?"
Later on the girl is yelling, "Cheese cheese, tomato
tomato!" The younger brother says, "Stop making sandwiches! ...
0 Comments, 32 Views,
10 Votes
,4.98 Score
|
|
monday 7/23/2018
ok its that time again who can make the day a little brighter
with a good joke???
0 Comments, 0 Views,
0 Votes
|
|
math 7/21/2018
A football coach walked into the locker room before a game,
looked over to his star player and said, "I'm
not supposed to let you play since you failed math, but we
need you in there. So what I have to do is ask you a math question,
and if you get it right, you can play." The player agreed,
and the coach looked into his eyes intently and asks, "Okay,
now concentrate... what is ...
0 Comments, 59 Views,
14 Votes
,4.26 Score
|
|
NEVER ASSUME THAT MEN UNDERSTAND 7/21/2018
A woman was in a coma. She had been in it for months. Nurses
were in her room giving her a bed bath. One of them was washing
her private area and noticed that there was a slight response
on the monitor whenever she touched her there. They tried
it again and sure enough, there was definite movement..
They went to her husband and explained what happened, telling
him, 'As crazy as this sounds, ...
0 Comments, 47 Views,
12 Votes
,4.92 Score
|
|
Blonde joke 7/20/2018
Why can't you tell a blonde knock knock jokes? <br><br>
A. Because she will leave to answer the door.
0 Comments, 9 Views,
7 Votes
,3.04 Score
|
|
Blonde joke 7/20/2018
Why can't you tell a blonde knock knock jokes? <br><br>
A. Because she will leave to answer the door.
0 Comments, 3 Views,
2 Votes
,2.42 Score
|
|
Blonde joke 7/20/2018
Why can't you tell a blonde knock knock jokes? <br><br>
A. Because she will leave to answer the door.
0 Comments, 1 Views,
1 Votes
,2.40 Score
|
|
end the week right 7/20/2018
ok funny Friday jokes please!!! it the end of the week lets
have them.
0 Comments, 1 Views,
1 Votes
,3.70 Score
|
|
789 7/18/2018
Why was six afraid of seven? <br><br>
Seven was a registered six offender.
2 Comments, 11 Views,
6 Votes
,3.93 Score
|
|
789 7/18/2018
Why was six afraid of seven? <br><br>
Seven was a registered six offender.
1 Comments, 6 Views,
4 Votes
,3.63 Score
|
|
789 7/18/2018
Why was six afraid of seven? <br><br>
Seven was a registered six offender.
1 Comments, 4 Views,
2 Votes
,3.81 Score
|
|
The Hearing Check 7/18/2018
A man feared his wife wasn't hearing as well as she used
to and he thought she might need a hearing aid. Not quite
sure how to approach her, he called the family doctor to
discuss the problem. The Doctor told him there is a simple
informal test the husband could perform to give the doctor
a better idea about her hearing loss. Here's what you
do, " said the Doctor, "stand about ...
0 Comments, 49 Views,
8 Votes
,4.64 Score
|
|
yachting!!! 7/18/2018
A man joins a soccer team and his new teammates inform him,
"At your first team dinner as the new guy, you will
have to give us a talk about sex." The evening arrives
and he gives a detailed, humorous account of his sex life.
When he got home, his wife asked how the evening went and
not wanting to lie, but also not wanting to explain exactly
what happened, he said, "Oh, I had to ...
2 Comments, 52 Views,
7 Votes
,3.80 Score
|
|
Wednesday hump joke 7/18/2018
Ok who's got one?? lets get this Wednesday started
off with a few funny jokes!!!
0 Comments, 1 Views,
1 Votes
,3.70 Score
|
|
skiers!! 7/17/2018
Three guys go to a ski lodge, and there aren't enough
rooms, so they have to share a bed. In the middle of the night,
the guy on the right wakes up and says, "I had this wild,
vivid dream of getting a hand job!" The guy on the left
wakes up, and unbelievably, he's had the same dream,
too. Then the guy in the middle wakes up and says, "That's
funny, I dreamed I was ...
0 Comments, 28 Views,
9 Votes
,3.64 Score
|
|
parents!!! 7/17/2018
A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when
her walks in. “Mother, where do babies come
from?” The mother thinks for a few seconds and says, “Well
dear, and fall in love and get married. One night they go into their bedroom, they kiss and hug, and have sex.”
The looks puzzled so the mother continues, “That
means the puts his penis in the ’s vagina. That’s how ...
1 Comments, 44 Views,
7 Votes
,4.57 Score
|
|
Love Making Night Before 7/16/2018
There is an Italian, a Frenchman, and an American sitting
in a bar talking and the Italian is bragging that last night
he made love to his wife 3 times and this morning his wife
made him breakfast in bed and told him how amazing he was
the night before. The Frenchman said "That's
nothing I made love to my wife 5 times last night and then
this morning to show her appreciation she made me ...
0 Comments, 44 Views,
4 Votes
,2.47 Score
|
|
jokes 7/16/2018
Monday fun day anyone? anyone got a goos joke? lets lighten
up the day.
1 Comments, 4 Views,
2 Votes
,1.04 Score
|
|
The Milk Bath 7/14/2018
A blonde heard that baths in milk would make her beautiful.
She left a note for her milkman to leave 25 gallons of milk.
<br><br>
When the milkman read the note, he felt there must be a mistake.
He thought she probably meant 2.5 gallons. <br><br>
So he knocked on the door to clarify the point. <br><br>
The blonde came to the door and the milkman said, "I ...
0 Comments, 59 Views,
4 Votes
,2.47 Score
|
|
When men were hard to find 7/13/2018
The US civil War had just ended and unmarried men were hard
to find, so Mabelle placed an ad in her local newspaper.
Mabelle lived in a small town in a rural area. But soon a discharged
vet of the war answered and was willing to mary her. So she
wrote back and agreed to meet him at the Justice of the Peace
on the following friday at 9 to mary. They met, got married
and loaded her large trunk ...
0 Comments, 58 Views,
5 Votes
,1.84 Score
|
|
lol 7/13/2018
A piece of string walks into a bar and orders a drink. The
bartender looks at him and says, "We don't serve
string here." So the string goes outside, twists
himself up a bit, kind of roughs up his ends and walks back
into the bar and orders a drink. The bartender looks at him
and says, "Aren't you that little piece of string
that was in here a few minutes ago?" The ...
2 Comments, 37 Views,
6 Votes
,3.37 Score
|
|
riddle 7/13/2018
Why can you never hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?
<br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
Because the pee is silent.
2 Comments, 10 Views,
4 Votes
,2.47 Score
|
|
What do you call 7/13/2018
a blonde with a chainsaw? A. Dead <br><br>
had to put this one up for Friday the 13th 
0 Comments, 5 Views,
1 Votes
,1.10 Score
|
|
Pope's new camera 7/13/2018
A tourist couple is visiting the Vaticant and sneaks into
the Papal Garden. They spot the Pope and start taking photos,
just as he jerks off and cums. But then he spots the tourists.
Horrified, he says I must have tham camera, as those photos
can't get out. The tourists say $2, 000 and you can
have it. Those Pope takes it , pays them, and places it on
his fireplace mantel. Later in the day ...
1 Comments, 40 Views,
2 Votes
,2.42 Score
|
|
friday funny 7/13/2018
Unbelievable! my downstairs neighbor was banging on my
door at 2:30 this morning. Good thing I was up prancing my
tuba.
0 Comments, 0 Views,
0 Votes
|
|
Does the bite? 7/12/2018
A man walks into a shop and sees a cute little dog. He asks
the shopkeeper, “Does your bite?” The shopkeeper says, “No, my does not bite.” The man tries to pet the and the bites him. “Ouch!”
He says, “I thought you said your does not bite!”
The shopkeeper replies, “That is not my dog!” <br><br>
from net   ...
0 Comments, 27 Views,
3 Votes
,1.47 Score
|
|
The power of punctuation: 7/12/2018
An English professor wrote the words：
“ A woman without her man is nothing”On the chalkboard and asked the students to punctuate it correctly.
All of the males in the class wrote：
“A woman, without her man, is nothing.”
All of the Females in the class wrote：
“A woman: without her, man is nothing.”
Punctuation is powerful~
from net
 ...
0 Comments, 20 Views,
1 Votes
,1.10 Score
|
|
A skeleton walks into a bar... 7/12/2018
... he orders a beer and a mop.
[image]
heyyo!
0 Comments, 8 Views,
2 Votes
,1.04 Score
|
|
Romantic Dinner 7/11/2018
A man and a woman were having a quiet, romantic dinner in
a fine restaurant. They were gazing lovingly at each other
and holding hands. <br><br>
The waitress, taking another order at a table a few steps
away, suddenly noticed the woman slowly sliding down her
chair, under the table and under the tablecloth, but the
man stared straight ahead. <br><br>
The waitress watched ...
0 Comments, 42 Views,
2 Votes
,3.12 Score
|
|
PAA 7/11/2018
I went to a meeting of Porn Addicts Anonymous yesterday
<br><br>
What a mob of wankers !
0 Comments, 2 Views,
1 Votes
,1.10 Score
|
|
Medical Exam 7/11/2018
During my medical examination, my doctor asked me about
my physical activity level. I described a typical day this
way: -‘Well, yesterday afternoon, I took a five-hour walk,
about 7 miles, through some pretty rough terrain. I waded
along the edge of a lake. I pushed my way through brambles.
I got sand in my shoes and my eyes and I avoided standing on
a snake. I climbed several rocky hills. I ...
0 Comments, 41 Views,
2 Votes
,3.12 Score
|
|
mid week humor 7/11/2018
Any takers, I not to funny today. lets have some good ones
0 Comments, 0 Views,
0 Votes
|
|
The Day Off 7/10/2018
Smith goes to see his supervisor in the front office. <br><br>
“Boss, ” he says, “we’re doing some heavy house-cleaning
at home tomorrow, and my wife needs me to help with the attic
and the garage, moving and hauling stuff.” <br><br>
“We’re short-handed, Smith, ” the boss replies.
“I can’t give you the day off.” <br><br>
“Thanks, boss, ...
0 Comments, 33 Views,
4 Votes
,4.41 Score
|
|
Baseball Game 7/10/2018
One day, the devil challenged the Lord to a baseball game.
<br><br>
Smiling, the Lord proclaimed, “You don’t have a chance.
I have Babe Ruth, Mickey Mantle and all the greatest players
up here.” <br><br>
“True, ” snickered the devil. “But I have all the
umpires.”
0 Comments, 18 Views,
3 Votes
,3.43 Score
|
